


tangled (you are for me)

by adventurousfeather



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Minor Character Death, One Shot, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, modern soulmates AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-14
Updated: 2015-06-14
Packaged: 2018-04-04 09:11:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4132014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adventurousfeather/pseuds/adventurousfeather
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>when a child is around the age of three or four, a mark appears on one of their wrists. this is the mark matches them to their soulmate. the design of the mark varies from each person, some have resembling letters, others have complicated and intricate lines tangled and faded into one another, while a few have mundane household objects, or family brands and crests.</p><p>clarke griffin is thundering her way through med school. alexandria woods is preparing herself to become the executive chairperson in her family's company. their lives are tangled with one another from the very beginning, but fate gives them different marks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	tangled (you are for me)

**Author's Note:**

> trigger warning: mild domestic abuse.  
> all mistakes are mine.

_though we’re tethered to the story we must tell / when i saw you, well i knew we’d tell it well / with a whisper we will tame the vicious seas / like a feather bringing kingdoms to their knees - turning page_ , sleeping at last.

.

when a child is around the age of three or four, a mark appears on one of their wrists. this is the mark matches them to their soulmate. the design of the mark varies from each person, some have resembling letters, others have complicated and intricate lines tangled and faded into one another, while a few have mundane household objects, or family brands and crests. most of the time, they hold no significance to the person, other than the fact that someone, somewhere may have the same mark as them.

so it comes with no surprise to an eight year old anya and her uncle gustus, when they hear a three year old lexa crying in her room, clutching her right wrist, screaming in pain.

“it burns, papa,” she sobs out, and gustus holds her, feeling helpless as he listens to his niece cry. gustus rocks her until the early hours of the morning, humming to her as he sits on lexa’s bedroom floor, with a stubborn anya, who refuses to leave them, sitting next to him, clutching her sister’s hand.

(their parents died tragically in a plane crash when lexa was two and anya was seven, leaving them in gustus’ care. but the thing is, gustus has never cared for a child in his entire life, so he hires indra washington as their nanny the very next day he finds out he is the official legal guardian of the two woods’ girls. so really, _technically_ , indra is their main caretaker. the only thing gustus is nurturing after his brother's death is the inherited multi-million dollar company, for anya to take over when she is ready.)

when the sun rises the next morning and its light peeks in through the windows, gustus examines lexa’s mark.

the signature family brand of the longsword is there, but it’s faded, and it is pierced through the outlines of a cogwheel, with detailed tiny patterns on it.

and he hopes, with all of he's made of, that these two girls in his life find their soulmate and live happily ever after, just like in their storybooks.

.

the day after clarke turns three, she’s sitting on her dad’s lap, holding onto his sleeves as he uses his legs to move the swing a little higher in their backyard. when her dad lets the swing slow down after listening to her squeals of laughter, her left wrist begins to tingle.

“daddy,” little clarke says, her hair tied up in a messy ponytail, and she’s about to tell him about the tingling sensation, but it disappears and it is suddenly replaced by a searing pain. she lets out a piercing scream, her other hand on her wrist immediately, and jake panics for a bit, unsure at first of what may have alarmed her. he takes his crying daughter inside the house, to where abby is reading a medical journal in her study.

“she’s getting her mark,” he announces and abby is up on her feet immediately, the journal forgotten and left to fall on the floor. “should we get some ice?”

“no,” is her immediate answer, “no ice, it makes the pain worse.” she gestures for jake to sit clarke down on the couch, and abby takes her daughter’s face in her hands. “alright, sweetheart, i’m going to need you to breathe with me, okay?”

clarke tries to obey and focus on her mom’s breathing demonstrations, but it’s a little bit hard when it feels like a red, glaring hot poker is being pressed against her wrist right now, and she physically cannot take her other hand off where it burns, not even to quell her growing curiosity and see what kind of mark is forming on her skin.

the marking lasts several hours, and eventually the pain fades and clarke falls asleep in exhaustion, and as her parents tuck her into her bed, they examine her wrist.

her mark is of a circular gear piece, or a cogwheel, with a small faded chess piece sitting in its centre and intricate patterns inside of it.

"thelonious' son, has the same mark. i've seen it. that's her soulmate," abby excitedly whispers as they turn off the lights and leave clarke’s room.

the next day, abby calls over her longtime friend and jake’s work colleague, thelonious jaha, along with his only son, wells. he’s a year older than clarke and he got his mark on his right wrist two months ago, and he showed it proudly to his best friend during one of their play dates.

when they place clarke and wells' wrists side by side, they notice their marks are similar, but wells has the outline of the cogwheel with the exact same chess piece inside, but his mark is missing the complex patterns and details inside the cogwheel that clarke has.

"his chess piece is bolder, darker," jaha notes as they examine their children's marks.

jake comments, "it's similar but not exactly the same."

"perhaps it's a personal touch?" abby suggests.

(humankind will never understand how fate works, how this ink reveals itself during turning points of their lives, how this ink reveals the way their lives will entangle with another.)

regardless, they push, this idea of clarke and wells being together. fate, after all, is never wrong. abby organizes more play dates and activities for the two children while gushing about their future, and jaha is all for it. however, jake only supports their plans half-heartedly.

"i am for clarke's happiness too, but we can't make these decisions for her." he tells his wife one night, as he watches abby get into bed beside him.

abby argues as she settles underneath the sheets, "you can't fight fate. they're soulmates, jake, just like we are."

an image of wells' similar but not matching mark flashes in jake’s mind, "we don't know that, and you can't force fate either. let it happen naturally, abby."

.

lexa is nearly four when a woman who introduces herself as aurora blake walks in the front door and tells them that indra is sick, and that she will be taking her place for a few days until their original nanny gets better. lexa first notices her pale complexion, dark long hair and a slim build, and the second thing that she notices about her new temporary nanny, is her small rounded stomach.

for the next few months, indra goes in and out of the hospital for an infection that just would not leave her, mainly for the fact that she never lets herself rest properly. aurora takes her place, her rounded stomach growing with each visit.

one day, a curious and newly turned four year old lexa approaches her, “nanny ‘rora,” she says, standing beside aurora who is washing her hands at the kitchen sink. the little girl pokes her stomach and asks, “why’s your belly so big?”

anya, perched on a stool at the island counter, happily eating her after-school snack, animal biscuits and iced tea lemonade, pipes up before aurora can answer, “it’s ‘cause she’s fat, dummy.”

lexa glances at her sister, then looks up at her nanny, placing her hands on aurora’s stomach. “it’s okay,” she reassures her, “you’re still beautiful even though you’re fat.”

aurora can’t help but laugh at her innocent and sincere expression, and she shakes her head, “my belly’s big because i have a baby in there,” she replies to lexa’s original question.

lexa’s eyes widen and she freezes. “you ate a baby?”

anya gasps and stands on the stool, shrieking, “you’re a carnival!” she points at aurora’s stomach, and the woman laughs again.

“no, darlings, i didn’t eat a baby. i’m having it, it’s going to come out in a few weeks.” aurora then turns to anya, her voice firm, “hey, stools are for sitting, not for standing.” she watches anya obey and return to her biscuits before she continues, “and the correct word is cannibal.”

.

indra finally gets better, but she returns with a limp on her leg and lexa hears the words, _‘infection after the accident’_ , and _‘nearly needed amputation’_ , and _'turned his life support off'_ when she listens to gustus and indra’s hushed conversation in the kitchen. she’s not entirely sure what these words mean, but she makes a mental note to ask anya later. anya’s like a walking dictionary.

“is nanny ‘rora not coming back ‘nymore?” lexa asks while she waits for indra to draw her a warm bath later that night.

“nope,” indra replies before taking the child and placing her in the bath.

“why?”

indra says a little absent mindedly, preoccupied with tying up lexa’s hair in a bun. “because she had her baby.”

“why?”

indra shushes her, “because she did, alexandria.”

(the use of her full name immediately hushes the child, but in her mind, she still can’t help but wonder why a little tiny baby will prevent aurora from ever coming back.)

after a while, as indra is washing the suds off her shoulders, lexa can’t help but ask, “why can’t she take her baby here so anya and i can play with it?”

indra lets out an involuntary chuckle, “the baby is too young, that’s why. she’s named octavia.”

“is she pretty like her mom?”

anya, who has been listening in to their conversation, pops her head in the bathroom and chimes in, “is she fat like her mom?”

"anya," indra chides, “are you finished with your homework?”

“i need help with my subtractions, please,” anya answers sweetly, flashing her nanny her perfect white teeth, losing her snarky tone.

“i’ll be there when i finish here with your sister,” is indra’s reply to the nine year old.

when indra is helping little lexa dress, she notices the mark on her nanny’s arm. she sees the outlines of a tribal design that’s wrapped around a dagger, and it covers indra’s upper wrist, and the child notices that the ink of her lines are white instead of black.

“why’s your mark like that?” lexa asks, pointing to the beautiful lines of fate on her skin.

“like what?”

“it’s white.”

indra’s face grows sombre but she manages to smile gently when she says, “it changes when your soulmate goes away.”

“goes away where?”

indra doesn’t reply to her further inquiry, only distracting her with the promise of chocolate chip cookies.

when lexa is eight and anya is thirteen, she remembers indra’s mark and wonders why it is different again. lexa asks her older sister where on earth indra’s soulmate would go.

anya grins brightly and suggests, “let’s google it!” and the two sneak into gustus’ office and opens his laptop, and it takes a while for anya to find an answer.

anya reads out loud from the screen, “ _' the lines of fate’s mark will change from black to white when..'_ ” she scrolls the page, “ _'when one’s soulmate passes away.'_ ”

lexa adorably scrunches up her nose in confusion, “what’s that mean?”

“i think it means when you die or something.” anya answers, unsure. she scrolls further down the page and reads more trivial facts about soulmates.

much later, lexa finds her nanny and hugs her tightly.

“what’s wrong?” indra asks, worried about lexa’s behaviour. she’s not usually this affectionate, only when she has just woken up in the morning or when she’s feeling ill.

so it takes her by surprise when lexa mumbles sadly in reply, “i’m sorry about your soulmate.”

“how did you find out?”

lexa and anya get grounded for using the internet without permission.

anya woods, the ever dramatic and rebellious child that she is, makes a picket in protest. “i do not associate myself with _grounders_ ,” she sneers when indra calls her down for dinner.

on the other hand, alexandria woods, the ever obedient and well-behaved child that she is, mumbles another apology as a plate of food is placed before her. this is the first time she has been grounded and she does not like the feeling. _at all._

gustus chuckles at her timid mood, “you are forgiven, lexa, as long as you don’t do it again.”

lexa looks up, relief flooding in her chest. “what about anya?”

“the more she acts out, the longer she is grounded.” indra sighs next to her, nudging her to eat her dinner. 

later that night, lexa sneaks anya some food and as she watches her sister gorge herself, she whispers, “hey, will you be good for papa and indra? they’ll ground you longer if you keep doing this.” she eyes the signs anya drew that are taped all over her room, titled with words _‘down with the system’_ and _‘freedom for the oppressed’_ , and various, creative caricatures of who she assumes to be her uncle and her nanny, with their faces crossed out.

anya ignores her request, and only thanks her for bringing her dinner. “hey kiddo, did you get me a cookie?”

“of course,” lexa says as she takes out a packet of crumbled chocolate chip cookie from her pocket.

.

when clarke is ten, she plays with wells up in the treehouse behind his home. the small lamp that serves as their source of light is currently lacking a working lightbulb, and it's nearly time for dinner so it's getting darker, but the pair are laying on the wooden floor, waiting for wells' mom to call them in from the ground.

wells holds up his right wrist and runs a thumb over his mark, "do you think we'll get married one day?" he asks the blonde next to him, who has now mirrored his actions with her left wrist.

clarke shrugs and then turns to look at him. "i don't mind if you're my husband, you're pretty cool."

"really?" he sits up abruptly, looking at her with wide eyes. he's always sort of had a crush on clarke ever since they were six and she had punched a boy named murphy when he tried to take away wells' colouring pencils. he will never admit that to clarke though, _nah uh._

she sits up and nods at him, a serious expression on his face, "really. but if you become my husband, you have to give me ice cream every night." clarke holds up her pinky finger, waiting for him to intertwine it with his and make his promise.

wells does, and he nods, "i'll give you everything you want."

when wells is fourteen and clarke is thirteen, clarke kisses another boy under the cherry tree while wells is in football practice. she tells him about it while they're in clarke's room, the blonde laying down on her stomach on the floor in front of the chess board, and wells is returning from the kitchen with two bottles of strawberry infused water.

"it was weird, like, his tongue was all wet and he was trying to shove it into my mouth," clarke shudders, obviously the experience has left her somewhat traumatised, so she has yet to notice the way wells has frozen in front of her. she takes a sip of water and her eyes finally land on her best friend who is staring at her wide eyed, and she asks, "what?"

he mumbles, "but i'm your soulmate.."

clarke blinks, and her eyes glance down at his wrist. "i know, i'm sorry, but it must sound weird. but i just wanna get experience before the real thing, you know? harper says that it's important to have experience before you marry your soulmate," she explains, hoping it will make wells feel better.

(in truth, she wants to say, "but we don't have the same mark."

"you don't feel like my soulmate.")

that night, wells wakes up sweaty from his sleep and his right wrist is suddenly burning. he screams, and his parents come barging into his room and stay with him until he falls asleep again.

when he wakes up in the morning, his mark has changed. the outline of the cogwheel is gone, leaving only the chess piece as his mark. he notes that it is still the chess piece that clarke has, the exact same knight piece, but he knows this is not the mark that is embedded in her skin. she has a detailed cogwheel, as well as the chess piece, the jaha family brand, which means her fate is tangled with his.

(but wells? his fate is tangled only with himself.)

when wells is sixteen and clarke is fifteen, he takes clarke out to go bowling and spends the whole time wiping his hands on his jeans. clarke laughs and teases him endlessly because he rolls the bowling ball right into the gutter several times.

"hey, remember when you were good at bowling? oh wait--"

wells rolls his eyes playfully, "shut it, griffin."

he takes her to their favourite ice cream parlour and they walk through the park, clarke's arm comfortably curled around his. and it's just one of their regular hangouts, clarke thinks, except for the fact that wells can't seem to look her in the eyes when they talk, and he glances around nervously when she asks him if he's okay. and clarke thinks everything is fine, she's just chilling with her best friend until--

until he walks her home and they stand on the front porch and clarke is about to wave goodbye to him, with the promise of calling him later that night, but then wells is leaning in and capturing her lips with his own.

it takes her by surprise and she's frozen and wells pulls back, blinking, and clarke shakes her head.

"wait, wait. this was a date?" and she recalls everything they've done and how not one moment during that night did she think that maybe they were on a date, but his odd behaviour suddenly makes sense.

his constantly sweaty pants, his inability to make eye contact; wells was nervous because he was taking clarke out on a date, and she did not even have a clue.

"i- it felt like a date.." wells' voice trails off.

"but we always go bowling, and we always get ice cream. this is what we always do, wells."

wells' visibly deflates, and he nods, "right, yeah. i'm sorry, i didn't--"

"look," clarke interrupts, not ready to deal with, whatever this is. "it's fine, really. it's okay," she reassures her best friend.

once she gets inside, she wonders what wells' may have said had clarke let him finish.

_i'm sorry, i didn't think of a better way to take you out on a date._

_i'm sorry, i didn't know you wouldn't want to kiss me._

_i'm sorry, i didn't mean to think you would reciprocate my feelings._

(later that night, she realizes that she has no romantic feelings for him.

much, much later, when the sun is peeking in through her curtains, she realizes that wells has been under the impression that they are soulmates. she does not feel that bond with him.)

when clarke is sixteen and he is seventeen, wells dies in a car accident with his parents. she doesn't find out until the next day.

the night before, she collapses on the kitchen floor in front of her parents, clutching her wrist and screaming at the searing pain on her skin.

"mom, dad," she sobs, holding her left wrist to her her chest. "it's burning, it burns."

when she wakes up in the morning, she examines her mark. the pain is long gone, along with the chess piece inside the cogwheel. in its place, sits a crown.

she practically runs downstairs to show her parents her new, changed mark, and she catches sight of abby crying into her dad's chest.

clarke blurts out, "what's going on?"

"honey, wells.. he's..."

(clarke cries harder than she did the previous night.)

.

when lexa and anya were younger, they were told by their uncle gustus that they would be inheriting their father's company when they are older.

"it is family tradition," he had said, "we've grown and developed this company for decades." he had turned to anya, and placed his hand on her shoulder. looking her in the eyes, he had said, "you will inherit it from me, when you are older."

gustus had groomed and prepared her for the day she'll take over, and with each growing day, anya tried to grasp at the freedom that she was slowly losing.

so it was inevitable, lexa realizes, that anya will reach her breaking point and finally stand up for herself, for what she really wants. at first, it comes in the form of slamming doors and talking back to gustus, and then her rebellion grew as she neared her high school graduation, whereafter she would be sent to a prestigious university to study something she did not want to do with the rest of her life. soon, anya was breaking curfew and sneaking out to go out with her friends, giving indra and gustus unnecessary stress when she wouldn't answer her phone and arrive home in the early hours in the morning.

when lexa is twelve, just weeks before her thirteenth birthday, and anya has just turned eighteen, lexa wakes up in the middle of the night to voices shouting downstairs.

the clock on her nightstand reads 4:52, and she slips out of bed and creeps towards the landing, her bleary eyes blinking away her sleep and trying to distinguish the shouting coming from the living room of the large house.

she recognises anya's voice as she holds on to the bannister, quietly coming down the stairs, "i never wanted this," anya's voice is shaking as if she was crying, and lexa pauses on the last step of the stairs. she can't see anything besides the entrance to the living room, but she hears anya continue, "dad wouldn't do this to me!"

it's her papa, uncle gus, that replies, "anya, your father wrote in his will that you will inherit--"

anya interjects, "i'm not inheriting _shit_ \--"

there's a sudden smack, the sound of skin slapping skin, and lexa's blood runs cold. anya is sobbing loudly now.

gustus' voice is not angry, but it is stern, "you will not speak to me that way, anya woods. i did not raise you to be like this."

and anya, who is not one to back down from any fight, who does not let anyone but herself have the last word, she growls out, "you didn't raise us at all, indra did!"

at the mention of her name, indra chides, "anya, that is enough."

lexa hears feet scuffling the hardwood floors, and anya emerges from the living room, tears streaming down her face, her right cheek glaring red. she startles when she sees a frozen lexa at the end of the stairs, but anya quickly recovers and ignores her, running past her and up the stairs.

gustus goes to follow anya and make her understand that this responsibility has been placed upon her is an honour, a great privilege, but he stops when he sees his younger niece, looking where anya had run off to.

"lexa," she hears her papa gruff out, his voice tired, "go back to bed, darling. i'm sorry you had to hear that."

she jerks her head in a nod, and gustus kisses her forehead, bidding her goodnight.

as lexa walks back up the stairs and back to her bed, she hears sobbing coming from anya's room, and her feet are taking her there and she doesn't knock before turning the handle and pushing the door open. the lamp beside anya's bed is on, the only source of light in the dim room, and there's a shaking lump underneath the covers  on the bed, gasping out for breath and bawling.

lexa whispers, "anya?"

the lump sniffles and anya pulls the blanket off of herself, wiping her tears away. "hey, kiddo," she croaks out, her throat sore from sobbing and yelling. "you should be in bed, you've got school later."

the fact that her sister hasn't told her to go away yet means that lexa is welcome, so she closes the door behind her and crawls onto anya's bed. she immediately takes her little sister in her arms and kisses her forehead. "sorry about that, uncle gus is a pain the ass."

when they're tangled into one another, and lexa begins playing with a loose strand of anya's hair, she mumbles tiredly, "he's only trying to do the right thing for us," she tells her sister, hoping to knock some sense into her.

anya laughs dryly, "maybe for you, kiddo, but not for me."

a strange tension begins to settle in the house the next day, with gustus trying to make anya see some sense, to see his goal is going to benefit her and the family tradition, while anya is still resisting, longing for the normal life where she gets to do whatever the hell she wants.

lexa is stuck in the middle, torn between trying to help her uncle gustus in making anya understand, and wanting to change the fact that her sister is being so miserable.

something was bound to give, bound to break.

five weeks later, when lexa is finally thirteen, she's suddenly woken by somebody jostling her in her sleep. she opens her eyes and anya is sitting on her bed, her hair tied up in a ponytail, her face free of make up. she has her jacket on her lap and a duffel bag at her feet, and when lexa sits up, anya pulls her in for a hug and leaves a sloppy kiss on her head.

"ew, anya, what the hell?" lexa complains, wiping her forehead with her pyjama sleeve. she manages to glance at the clock, reading 3:45, and she stares at anya, confused.

she grins, "i'm leaving, kid."

"what?"

"i'm leaving," anya repeats, "i'm running away. uncle gus is driving me insane and i can't do this family business thing. i don't want it."

half of lexa is glad, that her sister will finally be free from all the stress and misery she has been suffering, but the other half immediately worries.

"what about me?" lexa asks, a frown forming on her face.

anya chuckles, "you'll be fine, kiddo. uncle gus won't do the same to you, you're his favourite." she takes her little sister's hand and squeezes it, enjoying their final moments together until her freedom.

"where will you go?"

anya doesn't offer a reply, only pulling back her sleeve to reveal her mark. it's different, lexa notes, it is filled with _colour_. a patch of various shades of green covers her upper wrist, and on it lays her mark of a horse hoof is filled with colour now, too, with black and brown and green, the colours of the earth. their family brand is there, the sword piercing through the hoof, it is silver, with a golden hilt.

"i'll be fine, don't worry." she reassures lexa, who is staring at her mark in awe. there's a vibration coming from her pocket, and anya takes out her phone, reading the incoming message.

_i'm outside, baby._

anya hugs lexa once more, and she feels her little sister nuzzle into her neck. "i have to go," she pulls back and she can see unshed tears in lexa's eyes. "hey, i'll email you once i get settled away from here, okay? i'm still your big sis, kiddo, that's never gonna change."

lexa's voice is small and she's fighting back the urge to sob like a child, "promise?"

"promise."

"wait, anya," lexa says as she watches her sister pull the duffel bag's strap on her shoulder, "your mark, why did it change?"

anya only smiles her signature, cheeky grin, and she replies, "you'll find out one day."

gustus and indra are frantic once they discover the note on anya's bed the morning after, with only her messy, handwritten words, _'don't come looking for me, i don't want to be found,'_ and no contact details. her phone is unreachable, her friends have no clue who she could be with or where she could have fled, and they ask lexa, begging her that this is for her sister's safety.

but even lexa cannot offer an answer, only shaking her head, "she didn't tell me."

(she does not mention about anya's changed mark, the way her sister's eyes looked lighter and free, how exhilarating her voice sounded when she told lexa she was leaving. it won't help them in their search, anyway.)

gustus calls lexa in his office a few days after anya left and tells her, "anya is gone, which means you're my only hope for this company, lexa."

she's thirteen, and she looks so small in gustus' leather office chair, sitting in front of her uncle's desk.

"anya has broken one of your father's wishes," he adds, and lexa blinks, disappointment bubbling in her chest at herself and at her sister. she could've stopped anya, and her dad could be happy, wherever he is resting with their mother. but lexa also knows that anya needed this, anya needed to leave otherwise she would've been trapped in a life she hated, resenting everything and everyone around her.

when gustus pleads, "lexa, please do this for our family, for your parents," it convinces lexa and she agrees. _for anya._

that changes her life, that moment right there and then, and gustus promises to himself and to his late brother that he will not fail with this one, with lexa.

(she never really knew her dad, or her mom. they died when she was two, in a terrible plane crash, she’s told. but she thinks maybe they'll be proud of her if she takes this on, if she does this right.)

when lexa is fifteen, she catches sight of the mark on gustus' right wrist. "can i see?" she requests.

it's only the two of them at home, indra has taken a day off, and she's watching her uncle gus do the dishes after they've eaten lunch, and lexa is perched on the counter next to the sink.

gustus wipes his hands dry and shows her his mark, it's a golden goblet with entwined vines of sparkling blue, with a silver sword through it. she's still not sure why his mark is coloured, like anya's, and she promises to herself that one day she'll find out.

lexa runs her fingertips on his skin and inquires, "have you found your soulmate yet, uncle gus?"

(she switches from calling him 'papa' and 'uncle gus' sometimes, and the first time she calls him what anya had called him, lexa sees his eyes flash in sudden sadness.)

gustus lets out a laugh, and he nods. "my soulmate was already married when we met."

"and they didn't choose you?"

he shakes his head and regards her seriously. "lexa, in this world we have soulmates, but they're not always meant to be. sometimes, you just end up being friends, sometimes you never even meet them. sometimes, people have a mark and expect to match with someone, and it turns out that they don't have a soulmate." gustus pauses to let out a deep sigh, he continues, "if you push it, fate will intervene."

lexa has never heard that before. "what do you mean?"

gustus sighs again, and he hesitates when he replies, "i'll tell you when you are older."

there's silence for a little bit, then lexa bites her bottom lip. "are you friends with your soulmate?"

"yes, we talk often."

"will i ever meet them?"

gustus pauses, "perhaps."

.

when clarke is seventeen, she meets finn collins at the end of the summer before her senior year. he is charming and funny, and they spend their cool summer nights driving around town, laughing and singing along to the radio.

finn takes her to the edge of a cliff, overlooking the city lights and the dark clear sky. he points at the stars, "i want to go up there, someday."

clarke grins, "take me with you." his arm is curled around her, keeping her warm, and she snuggles closer to his body.

"i will," he murmurs, leaning in.

finn kisses her and clarke sees the stars behind her eyelids, and she swears she has never been this in love before.

two days later, finn breaks his right wrist after a biking accident, and clarke realizes she has never seen his mark.

it could be him, she thinks excitedly.

clarke visits his house, and she is welcomed by his parents who then give her directions to finn's room. she knocks before letting herself in, and she finds finn clutching his cast on his bed.

"aww," she coos sympathetically, sitting on the bed. "you poor thing."

finn sits up, "you should kiss it better," and clarke laughs before pressing her lips on his.

the cast stays, for six weeks, and she's three weeks into senior year when she receives a text from finn, during her biology lab.

_finally getting my cast off today!_

she replies with a text back, asking what time he'll be home from the hospital so she can come over, and he replies with a sad smiley face.

 _not today, babe,_ his text reads, _spending time with the parents to celebrate my castless self, maybe tomorrow?_

she agrees, a little sad, but she catches sight of her own mark, and it is replaced with the excitement of finally finding out the design of his.

clarke arrives the next day, with chocolate mint ice cream in hand and finn greets her at the door with a hug.

"finally," she chuckles, "no more awkward positions during make out sessions."

finn answers with a laugh, "i liked it better when you were on top anyway."

they order pizza a few hours later, and clarke finds the opportunity to ask about finn's mark. he's wearing a long sleeved shirt that covers both of arms, and he hesitates when clarke pulls up the sleeve to reveal his right wrist.

it takes her completely by surprise, because his mark is coloured. the background is red, with random patches of light grey, and his mark is of a raven, with beautiful black wings. there are boots, coloured with different shades of silver.

"the space boots, that's my family brand." he explains, as she runs her fingers on his skin, awed by the colour. "the raven is--" he stops abruptly, his eyes widening slightly at clarke, but she doesn't see. she reveals her own mark on her left wrist, the black lines of a detailed cogwheel and the crown that lies in its centre.

"you're not mine," clarke mumbles.

finn replies, "i can be," placing his hand on her cheek. "i'm in love with you, clarke."

she doesn't reply, only kisses him and tries to forget the disappointment she feels in her chest.

("it's coloured," clarke remarks when they're cuddling in bed later on.

finn answers, "it's always been that way, ever since i got my mark.")

two weeks later, a week before clarke's eighteenth birthday, she meets raven reyes, finn's long distance girlfriend.

(they met when raven was five and finn was four. raven already had her mark, and finn didn't, and when their arms brushed in the playground, finn immediately got his.)

clarke is in finn's house, and they're sitting at his dining table. clarke is doodling absentmindedly on the margins of her organic chemistry book, and finn is making paper airplanes, they're both procrastinating their english lit paper that's due in two days, even though they vowed that they were going to be productive today.

the front door opens and at first, they both think it's finn's older brother, atom, coming home from lacrosse practice, but a girl's voice echoes in the hallway.

"honey, i'm home!"

finn immediately jumps from his seat when he recognises the voice, and clarke asks, "who's that?"

the unexpected guest enters the dining room and spots finn, and raven beams widely. "hey, stranger," she greets before pulling him into a hug. clarke is watching from her seat, wondering how she could be related to finn, but her train of thought is suddenly interrupted when--

when raven kisses finn passionately, and finn kisses back. _right in front of clarke._

 _'you're not mine,'_ echoes in her head, and her heart drops in her chest.

and raven's left wrist catches her eye, and she sees a black raven and silver boots on red background and she realizes that--

"hey, i'm raven, finn's soulmate," raven greets, slightly apologetic for ignoring finn's guest.

clarke blinks, "hi," she manages to say before she smiles, it's a little forced. "i'm clarke, finn's--"

"friend," the boy interjects, and clarke cuts her eyes to him and sees him gulp and look at her worriedly. "we were just doing our english lit paper," he adds.

raven laughs, and nods at the doodles and paper airplanes, "being productive, i see."

"actually, i need to go home. my mom just texted me," clarke lies, and turns to pack up her stuff.

"what about our essay?" finn asks, obviously trying to say that he doesn't want her to leave.

 _please stay,_ he pleads silently with his eyes, _i'll explain, let me explain._

but clarke isn't looking at him, she's too busy shoving her books into her bag. "we can work on it tomorrow, in the library," it's another lie, because she knows she's going to be avoiding him from now on. she throws a mumbled goodbye to raven, and practically runs out of the house. clarke detours from her usual route home, heading to the park instead. she approaches the tree that had her and wells' name carved into it, and she cries under the shade of its leaves.

clarke's phone rings that night, and she ignores the call, and the following twenty more. but at around eight, the doorbell rings and jake answers the door, and within minutes, he calls her name from downstairs.

she finds finn on her front door, his bike helmet on his head, and she doesn't really want to tell her parents yet so clarke invites him up to her room.

"i'm sorry," finn starts once they're in the confines of clarke's room. she sits on the computer chair and watches him take off his helmet. "i should've told you. i thought i was never going to see her again, she was in early summer admissions in university."

"it doesn't matter anymore. she's your soulmate, you don't give up on your soulmate, finn."

he shakes his head, "i'm in love with you, clarke."

she looks down and bitterly thinks, _'at least one of us is.'_

"raven being my soulmate doesn't matter. _i found you_ ," he murmurs.

"it does matter. i'm done, finn."

clarke avoids him in school, and two days after her birthday, she runs into raven while she's grocery shopping with abby.

raven regards her coolly, "clarke griffin, am i right?"

clarke looks back at where her mom is, reading labels off a tin can, a good distance between them, before she nods at raven.

"you stole my boyfriend." raven accuses, crossing her arms over chest.

clarke counters with, "i didn't steal him, he didn't tell me you existed."

raven's eyes soften a little bit, as she realizes they were both victims of finn's actions.

clarke shakes her head, "it doesn't matter anyway, i'm avoiding him in school." she eyes the mark peeking out of raven's left wrist, "he's yours."

"he is," raven narrows her eyes, "i'll beat your ass if you go near him."

(clarke does not feel threatened, but she makes an extra effort to avoid finn collins after that little run in. her ass is too cute to be beat.)

.

when lexa is eighteen, she meets costia. she's one of the company's shareholder's daughter, free-spirited and bubbly, costia seemed to be always smiling. lexa falls in love with her at first sight.

her wrist does not tingle when their hands brush, but her heart in her chest skips a beat and she sort of forgets how to breathe when costia says her name with a wide grin. it takes lexa three weeks after initially meeting her, to finally find the courage and ask costia out for coffee. her heart practically stops in her chest when costia nods enthusiastically, fishing her phone out of her pocket to give lexa her number.

she finds out that costia is unmarked, a rarity in modern society.

"it just means i have full control of my life, not pre-destined by a magical tattoo," she had said, rolling their eyes at the topic of marks, on their first date. costia had then leaned over the table and took lexa's hand in her own, her voice dropping low, and it is almost sultry and lexa momentarily forgets her own name when costia asks, "do you believe in soulmates?"

she can barely stammer out an answer, and it's embarrassing enough because she's not usually this uncomposed, but lexa thinks maybe this is how it's supposed to feel when you finally meet your soulmate.

"i- i'm not sure," lexa gulps, her hands tangling with costia's. "i think so?" she thinks of anya's mark and gustus' mark, the coloured pattern that sits on their wrist, but then she thinks of indra's and the white lines that is slowly fading on her skin as she grows older. lexa glances down at her own mark, only black lines and still uncoloured, and thinks maybe this is how it's going to be for the rest of her life.

costia is no one like she has ever met before, she has a enthusiastic laugh that almost always end up in a snort, and her black hair is long enough to reach halfway down her back. and when she kisses lexa for the first time, all she can think of is, _'this is it, this is the final puzzle piece i have been missing, i have found her.'_

but her wrist declares otherwise, taunting her when she's in the shower or when she catches sight of its simple black lines.

but then she thinks of the way costia is unmarked and feels a little bit better, before shrugging it off and moving on with her day.

the day before she starts university, anya calls her. they've been keeping up contact ever since she ran away from gustus, and lexa still hasn't been told where she is or where she could be, but she's glad anya seems to sound safe.

"i think i've met my soulmate," lexa mumbles into the phone, after the greetings and catching up on mundane things with her sister. "her name is costia."

anya stills before she asks, "you think? you don't sound very sure, kid. did your mark change?"

"was it supposed to?"

"uh, _yes_. that's how i found out i found mine." lexa can almost see the eyeroll anya is giving her.

she blinks, and looks up, out the large windows offering her the amazing view of the campus. she is lucky enough that her uncle gus spent a boatload of money to get her into this university, and luckier that he has made sure that she will be staying in one of their finest apartments, free of annoying roommates.

(secretly, lexa is saddened by the fact that she won't be making friends and doing random roommate shenanigans in university, but gustus reminds her that she is not here for fun. she is here to learn so she can take over the company and make her family proud.)

"she is unmarked, anya," lexa remarks.

"what? that's weird. then she's not your soulmate."

she's not liking where this conversation is going now, "you sound so sure."

anya laughs, "of course i'm sure, kiddo. remember what the book of fate said, _'one who meets their match will have a burst of colour in their mark.'_ "

"but she's unmarked," lexa murmurs. "does that not mean she is free to be with who she wants?"

"maybe," her sister replies. "but you're not. and the only explanation i've got as to why costia's not marked, is that there is nobody in this world that she is predestined with. fate has not decided on her, yet."

"you do not speak for fate, anya."

sensing her sister's annoyed tone, anya's voice softens. "hey, kiddo, i'm sorry. i'm just hitting you with hard facts. maybe it's you, maybe it's not you."

lexa sighs, and she changes the subject, silently indicating that she is done with the previous one. "when are you coming back?"

"not for another while," is the answer she gets, and the answer she has received for the last five years.

costia moves into the apartment after two months of dating. they both agree that it is more convenient, so costia doesn't have to put up with her annoying roommate and lexa doesn't have to be alone; it's a win-win situation.

after five months of university, lexa begins to become immersed in her work, her studies. she leaves the apartment around eight in the morning, sometimes earlier, with her breakfast half-eaten and a goodbye kiss on costia's lips. when she's not in lectures, she's in the library, her face in a book or her eyes glued to her laptop as her fingers are working. she gets home around twelve hours later, exhausted and ready to collapse on the bed, but instead she greets her girlfriend with a hug and a kiss on her temple.

that's her routine for five days a week. on weekends, she studies for five hours each day, which annoys costia to no end.

"you should take a day off, babe," she once offers lexa, "you're only a freshman and you're already doing this much." costia eyes the stacks of books perched on the desk, she adds, "i don't think i've borrowed this many books from the library in my entire life."

lexa is editing an essay on her laptop, so she mumbles distractedly, "it's just a little bit of light reading."

"your definition of that phrase is incredibly wrong," costia replies, rolling her eyes. she moves lexa's arm so she can sit on her lap. "babe," she whispers, her face is close to lexa's now, but the latter's eyes are still focused on the computer screen.

lexa only raises her eyebrows and smiles a little when costia starts peppering kisses on her jawline.

"come play with me," costia murmurs, her hands snaking underneath lexa's shirt, feeling her toned stomach on her fingertips.

she gulps, "i'm busy."

costia smirks, "too busy to fuck your girlfriend?" she knows dirty talk will eventually wear lexa down and she knows she'll end up getting pinned down on the floor.

her determination to finish this essay tries to resist, but really, how can she say no to a hot girl on her lap, offering to be fucked senseless? lexa's hands still, and she takes in a sharp breath. "you asked for it," is the last thing costia hears before she's being carried towards the bed.

costia understands, that lexa needs to prove that she is the best, that she can handle the responsibility that is going to be placed on her when she graduates university, for the company and for her family. what she doesn't understand is why constant, hard studies have no breaks for parties or chill nights in, binge watching on netflix and cuddling with her girlfriend, and it infuriates her.

lexa's workaholic trait becomes the topic of their many, many arguments for the next four years.

lexa offers only one explanation, and it nearly drives costia insane.

"it's a heavy burden placed upon me, but i have to do it, i can't just stop to take breaks--"

"yes, _you can!_ " costia interrupts, tired of the same charade they do every time costia invites her out with her friends. "i don't know how you do it, lexa, but you need to do something that's not academically related, otherwise your brain will probably explode."

lexa shakes her head, "it's just determination, costia, i'm fine."

"yeah, well i'm not," she bites back, and she sees lexa's eyes widen. "i feel like we've grown distant over the last four years."

lexa shakes her head, "nonsense," she says. "it's because we're both graduating now, we have our respective thesis to do so--"

"no, no, it's definitely not that."

and lexa wants to tell her, _'i love you but i have fallen out of love with you,'_ but she doesn't.

when lexa is twenty-two, costia proposes, the day after their graduation.

"i will give you the world, alexandria woods," costia offers. "just dump the company and choose me."

when lexa is twenty-two, she chooses her family's company over costia. "i am sorry," she whispers tearfully.

costia kisses her and pleads, "one more night?"

(she's silently hoping that she'll get to change lexa's mind, to wipe away the doubts and second thoughts clouding her senses right now.

but she knows this company has been in lexa's life before she showed up, and costia knows this could be their end.)

that night, they make love, and it's the most passionate sex lexa has ever had. it's almost as if they're pouring all the love they lost over the years into this one final night.

moments before lexa falls asleep, she cries into the pillow next to a sleeping costia and mumbles, "you are not for me."

when costia rouses from her sleep, her wrist burns. after a few hours, the pain fades and there is a mark on her right wrist. the fact that it's on her right and not left immediately alerts lexa that it could not match her mark. 

(soulmates have matching marks, on opposite wrists. while one has their mark on their left, their match will have theirs on their right. the book of fate states, _'one's mark is opposite their match on their wrists, so when their hands and fates tangle, the mark finds its way to its tethered match.'_

lexa thinks the second part is vague, but gustus had once explained to her that it will make sense one day.)

they examine her mark, and they see black lines forming what looks like icicles, wrapping around costia's right wrist.

lexa was not for costia.

two days later, lexa moves into her new apartment near the financial district of the city and near her family's company, and just as she is unpacking, she falls to the floor and her right wrist burns.

 _'please not icicles,'_ she begs to fate.

the pain lasts hours, and she cries on the floor, clutching her hand, wishing the pain to leave her. eventually she falls asleep and dreams of her uncle gustus chasing her in the park, the grass underneath her feet soft.

when lexa wakes from her nap, she looks at her mark. it has changed.

the cogwheel and its intricate details remain, but the sword piercing through its centre is gone. inside the gear piece, a crown lies.

.

when lexa is twenty-four and anya is twenty-nine, anya returns after eleven years. she stands taller, more confident, but she still has the same lazy strut when she walks, and that signature teasing smirk reserved only for her little sister.

she unexpectedly strides into lexa's office, in the middle of the day. "hey, small fry," she greets as she plops down on one of the expensive and leather couches.

lexa nearly falls out of her seat from where she's sitting at her desk, "anya?!"

(lexa is the only one that anya kept contact with. she sends her uncle and her nanny occasional birthday cards and emails, letting them know that she is safe. lexa understands that anya couldn't do it, couldn't take on the company, and she doesn't fault her older sister for that.

but this, this is the first time they've seen each other in the flesh ever since that night lexa woke up in her bed to find anya with a duffel bag by her feet.)

lexa runs over to anya and hugs her tightly, and tears come to her eyes but she manages to keep them from falling. "why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"and ruin the surpise? nah uh, kiddo." her sister laughs, before lexa joins her on the couch.

"i'm nearly twenty-five anya, i am no longer a child."

and her sister stares at her, her shining with pride, "nah, you're still that little idiot who fell into a puddle of mud to me."

lexa glares, her cheeks pink from the recollection of their childhood adventures, but lets it go. she shakes her head, "is it just you?"

anya answers, "i brought tris with me."

and lexa recalls her little niece, tris, who is turning nine in a few months, born out of anya's abusive relationship when she was turning twenty-one. the child's existence has only been mentioned before, along with a few pictures to let them know that she is ninety-five percent woods, from their distinctive eyes to her mark which boasts their family brand.

lexa inquires, "any news of her father?"

anya scoffs as she replies, "well, the piece of shit's still in prison so no change there."

anya woods is still the rude mouthed, protective sister that lexa always had, and she is glad that she is back in her life.

(anya's ex-boyfriend had been charged with aggravated assault and attempted murder, and it took years and years until she finally felt safe to come home to her family. her uncle gustus supported her, hired the best legal team he could find, gave her a place to hide from the brute of a man that is the father to her daughter. their differences are done and dusted now, mostly by lexa who only wants her family together again.)

"hey, is indra still around?" anya asks a little while later, as she watches lexa wrap up her work.

"why do you ask?"

anya answers with, "i need a nanny for tris, she's going to need someone to watch her when i start working for you, commander." she winks at her little sister as she throws a salute.

lexa chuckles, "indra is old, anya, i believe she has retired."

"well, maybe she knows someone." her sister shrugs.

"i'll call her later for you."

they talk of mundane things when lexa invites anya to lunch, catching up with each other since their last exchange of emails, and anya mentions costia.

"why did you two break up?"

"she proposed," lexa replies, looking away. "she got her mark."

anya doesn't know which one is the real reason, and she doesn't want to push, knowing it is a sensitive topic to her sister. "well, that's a bit late. let me guess, it wasn't you, huh?"

lexa shakes her head, "mine changed too."

"what?" and anya takes her wrist and examines it, running a thumb over the new, unfamiliar crown. "what happened to the sword?"

"it disappeared," lexa answers. "it didn't mean anything, did it?"

"it's our family brand," anya states. "uncle gus has it, i used to have it, even tris has it."

"it's gone now," lexa mumbles.

"don't worry about it, it probably just means you'll be taking the last name of your soulmate."

"i'm not marrying a man," lexa mutters, rolling her eyes.

"how heteronormative of you," anya laughs. "oh my gay baby sister, don't you ever change."

.

when clarke is twenty-three, she grows excited at the fact that she is starting med school in the upcoming fall. her dad advises that she look into getting roommates, before presenting a box containing the keys to her new apartment.

"your mother and i are so proud of you," jake tells her as he kisses clarke's forehead.

clarke posts a notice looking for roommates before the semester begins, and a man named bellamy blake answers and asks to meet for coffee to discuss the potential living space she is offering.

"it's not actually me who's going to be your roommate, it's my younger sister and her best friend. her name is octavia. i'm just here to make sure you're not a psycho," he explains with a smirk, regarding her friendly eyes.

"overprotective much?" clarke teases.

bellamy rolls his eyes playfully and ignores that comment. "so, do you have a history of kidnapping girls and disemboweling them?"

clarke laughs, "only the cute ones."

clarke tells him about the three bedroom apartment, how almost every piece of furniture is new, how the neighbourhood is safe and is close to campus. she boasts the amenities the apartment offers, and she promises that octavia will be in safe hands with her.

bellamy decides that octavia will probably get along well with clarke, and he tells clarke that he will let his sister know about the apartment so they can go view it.

"what's your sister's best friend's name again?"

"raven reyes," he replies.

(clarke swears she has heard that name before.)

she meets octavia after a week when she arrives with bellamy in tow to view the apartment, and she decides that this girl is going to be her new best friend. octavia moves in almost immediately, excited of finally living away from her older brother. "he's a cop, so it's like ten levels beyond overprotectiveness. i might as well have been living under the floor," she had told clarke, as they brought octavia's stuff into her new room.

she meets raven two days after that, and the first thing she says is, "oh, fuck," when she recognises the girl.

raven replies with, "oh, shit."

octavia stands between them, confused, a bag of churros in her hands. there are moving boxes and bags and clutter surrounding them, and there is a strange, awkward tension that falls between clarke and raven.

"you're the one who stole my ex-boyfriend."

"i- you're the one who threatened to beat me."

octavia stands between them, frozen with her eyebrows raised and eyes wide, a churro sticking out of her mouth.

it's a little awkward at first, with raven glaring at her, and clarke's eyes flitting everywhere but on the girl's face. she catches sight of raven's mark, still coloured like she last saw it years and years ago, and she wonders what happened between her and finn.

eventually raven says, "i'm over it if you're over it."

clarke nods, sighing in relief, and she holds out her hand, "let's start over."

the tension dissipates as quickly as it came, and by the end of the day, the three girls are tired from unpacking and reorganizing their new apartment together.

(technically, only clarke and octavia unpacked and reorganized the furniture, raven was left with the task of building the shelves and assembling the dining set that clarke purchased earlier that week from ikea. they listened and laughed at raven who groaned and muttered to herself as she tried to make sense of the scattered parts around her.)

clarke learns that raven is a junior engineer for the company that sponsors the engineering department in the university, while octavia is studying childcare, with two years left of academic studies mixed in with occasional part-time work.

she meets lincoln after two weeks, octavia’s boyfriend and soulmate, a tall, hulking guy with muscles threatening to rip out of his tight shirt.

clarke joins him on the couch and curiously asks, “what do you study, lincoln?”

he replies with a grin, showing off his perfect white teeth, “early childhood education, i’m on a specialized course though.”

“meaning…?”

“meaning i want to work specifically with young children that have neurodevelopmental disorders, like autism.” he chuckles.

“ah,” clarke nods, and after that, she associates him with the words _‘giant cuddle bear.’_ she mentions it to raven and octavia, the latter laughs.

"funny 'cause he is a cuddle bear."

raven scrunches up her nose and sticks out her tongue, "couples in love disgust me."

(clarke learns that the mark stays on a person's skin even when they've found their soulmate, but feelings don't. she learns that finn had confessed to cheating on raven with multiple girls while she was a freshman, the same year she had first met clarke.

raven tells clarke when octavia is in her room, "i actually want to thank you. if it wasn't for you, i'd still be stuck with him." her voice drops in a whisper, as though she was only telling herself, "he said there were eighteen other girls clarke, besides you, during those months i was gone."

clarke blinks, because damn, _eighteen?_ she replies, "i thought i was the only one."

and then it makes sense suddenly, when she remembers how finn always made plans for them, how he always said when she could come over and when she couldn't. she remembers how finn always hid behind the excuse of his parents wanting to do stuff with him, but she never saw his mom or dad be affectionate with finn.

_not today, babe, spending time with the parents to celebrate my castless self, maybe tomorrow?_

"me too, clarke, me too.")

.

when clarke is halfway through her first year of med school, octavia tells her that she won't be home for a few days.

"staying over at lincoln's?"

"i wish," she sighs. "you know my mentor? indra, my mom’s best friend? well she's got a nannying job for me, it's the niece of some hot shot business lady she used to watch, so i have to be 'trained properly'." she holds up her hands to emphasize the quote on the last phrase, her eyes rolling in exasperation. "it's just a kid, how hard can it be?"

"maybe the kid's a brat," raven suggests.

clarke laughs, "have fun," she tells her roommate, before returning her attention to her anatomy paper.

that becomes normal for all of them: clarke is busy with her rigorous studies and raven doesn't come home until it's late in the evening, usually from working in the engineering department with a bunch of 'wrench monkeys' as she refers to her work colleagues, and octavia keeps herself busy with her occasional nannying job, and lincoln.

one day, clarke finds a nine-year old kid dressed in her school uniform, her long brown hair tied back in a long fishtail braid, sitting in their living room watching tv and eating cereal out of the box.

clarke pauses from where she's standing, her bag in her hand. she thinks maybe she walked into the wrong apartment by mistake, and she doesn't doubt that she probably did, seeing how her brain has turned into mush, filled with nothing but facts about thoracic cavity of the human body, the topic of her quiz earlier that morning. but her key fit into the lock and the room looks very much like her shared apartment.

"uh, who are you?"

"tris woods," the mystery child glances at her and regards her with a gentle smile.

clarke narrows her eyes. "how'd you get in here?"

tris answers, "octavia picked me up from school and took me here."

the girl in question emerges from her room with wet hair, spilling excuses at clarke, "sorry, clarke. i spilled coffee on myself and i needed to change and i didn't have time and--"

clarke raises her hands, glad that their apartment is not being invaded by creepy cereal-eating kids with an affinity for the disney channel, "it's fine, o, really."

tris, ignoring the conversation between the two adults in the room, pipes up, "hey, do you have any juice?"

tris becomes a regular guest in their apartment, and clarke decides that she likes her. she's well-mannered and quiet, distracting herself by doing her homework and watching tv. raven, however, does not share clarke's fondness for her though, because tris ends up eating her favourite cereal.

"hey, that's my cereal," raven complains one day when she walks in with clarke to find octavia and the little girl doing homework and eating raven's fruit loops.

"it doesn't have your name on it," tris replies cheekily.

when tris arrives two days later and goes into the pantry to steal some more cereal, she finds the box of fruit loops covered in messily written words, _'raven reyes raven reyes raven reyes raven reyes raven reyes'_.

(tris opens the box and digs out a handful of cereal anyway.)

clarke and raven meet tris' mom, a gracefully thin, tall woman named anya woods, when she comes every night to pick up the young girl. they agree that tris gets her snark and sass from her mother, as well as the way their lips would almost identically quirk up in a smirk.

eventually anya warms up to them, after meeting them constantly at the end of the day for a few weeks, and after tris gushes over them, and one night as she hands octavia her weekly envelope, she says, "i can't pick her up tomorrow, so expect my sister around seven."

octavia nods, "what's her name?"

"lexa woods."

.

lexa woods is late.

her conference finished at half six, and then she ended up talking to one of the company's shareholders and answering his questions and that took nearly an hour. she only remembered that she promised to pick up tris as she was driving home.

the digital clock in her car reads 8:02 and lexa groans as she follows the GPS directions to tris' nanny's apartment.

lincoln rings the buzzer outside clarke's apartment building exactly ten minutes later, a bouquet of flowers in his hand. he's dressed in dark slacks and a light blue button up shirt, with his sleeves folded up to his elbows, revealing his mark of a white flower similar to the ones in his bouquet, its shimmering green stem wrapped around a golden arrow, his family brand. he hears the static of the intercom cackle before octavia's voice says, "come on up."

lincoln walks into the apartment minutes later and greets octavia with a kiss on the cheek before presenting the flowers.

"our flowers?"

"of course, love."

octavia pulls him in for a kiss, and only pulls back when she hears raven fake gagging behind them.

clarke yells out from where she's sitting on the couch with tris and raven, "guys, there is a child in the room, please don't scar her like this." she begs dramatically.

and lincoln finally notices tris, whose eyes are being covered by raven, who is still fake gagging.

"you two are disgusting," raven remarks.

"shut up," octavia mutters with a grin, before going into the kitchen to place the flowers in a vase. she calls out from where she is, "we can't leave yet, not until tris' aunt picks her up--"

clarke interjects, "hey, no, don't put your date night on hold. we can watch tris until she's gone."

"are you sure?" octavia asks, returning from the kitchen with the vase of flowers.

tris takes in the tall stranger and walks up to lincoln. she asks, "are you octavia's boyfriend?"

lincoln nods, "i am," he answers.

tris points to his left wrist, "can i see your mark?" lincoln shows her the white flower and the arrow on his wrist, and tris exclaims, "hey, you have the same one as octavia!" she touches the beautiful colours of the mark, fascinated.

lincoln laughs at her enthusiasm, "indeed i do."

"why's it coloured? mine only has lines." tris holds up her wrist and taps her mark: black lines resembling a bridge and a sword.

he replies with, "it changes once you meet your soulmate. it gets filled with colour."

"oh," tris nods in understanding. she recalls her family members' notable marks, "my grandpa has a silver goblet and a silver sword."

"he has met his soulmate then," lincoln comments.

tris shakes her head, her face growing serious. "he's not married though. his soulmate married someone else."

"it happens," he says, trying to comfort the girl. "but it's uncommon. don't worry, you'll meet yours and you'll fall in love."

tris smiles, "that's what my mom says!" she pauses and adds, "she doesn't have a mark."

raven chimes in, intrigued by their current conversation, "she's unmarked?"

tris shakes her head. "she bit her mark off."

_"why?"_

_“what?”_

_“whoa.”_

tris shrugs, "i dunno, she just told me she bit it off."

(anya will never tell tris why. anya will never tell her daughter how she was marked and matched with a man named tristan, lean and muscular. he was gentle and caring and he held her as if anya was the most important thing in the world. tristan was the one who urged her to run away from the responsibility gustus tried to place upon her.

"run away with me," he had asked her, "you, me, and the world. it'll be one big adventure, baby. you'll be free from your uncle."

anya had picked tristan over her family, and found herself pregnant two years later.

anya will never tell tris how tristan grew cold and mean, and started hitting her and resenting her for little things between them in those two years.

"you're worthless," he had said to her, "you're lucky i still put up with you. that mark on your arm means you belong to me, you're mine, you hear me? nobody will ever love you like i do."

anya will never tell tris how she realized that she cannot live like this, that she cannot allow the growing child in her stomach to be exposed to this horrible man she had once fallen in love with.

anya will never tell tris how she ended up in the emergency room, blood in her mouth from ripping off her own flesh, ripping off her mark, a silver sword pierced through a dark horse hoof. anya took fate by its neck and took hold of her life, of her destiny.

tris will never know how relieved anya was, when tris was born and tristan was sentenced to jail after trying to kill her mother.)

the conversation ends with tris' non answer, and octavia asks, "are you two sure about this?" her coat in hand.

"yeah, go before we change our minds," raven tells her, waving her off.

octavia kisses tris' head, "see you on monday, kid," she says before leaving with lincoln.

lexa buzzes in half an hour later, flushed from rushing from where she parked her car. "lexa woods, i am here to pick up tris?" she calls out to the intercom.

"sure, come on up." a voice replies before lexa hears the door click open.

she walks into the building and into the elevator, lexa reaches the fifth floor, she stands before the door with 319.

she knocks.

her right wrist feels warm, but she ignores the sensation.

tris opens the door, "hi aunt lexa," she greets before hugging her. "you're late."

"i'm sorry, i forgot. i'll make it up to you, promise."

tris leads her into the apartment, and lexa sees raven pop her head out of her room, "yo," she hollers before disappearing back inside.

"sorry about raven," a blonde young woman tells her, and lexa feels her heart in her throat. her blue eyes are mesmerizing, and she smiles easily and lexa feels her wrist tingle.

"are you octavia?"

the gorgeous creature before her shakes her head, glancing at her left wrist before replying, "i’m her roommate, octavia left an hour ago. she was going to wait but she had a date."

lexa nods and gulps, "my apologies, i lost track of time." she holds out her right hand, "i'm lexa, tris' aunt."

clarke takes her offered hand with her left and shakes it. "clarke," she answers with a smile and they hold each other's gaze for a moment.

and then the moment ends abruptly when they pull back their hands harshly, and clarke clutches her wrist in pain.

lexa is doing the same, and tris approaches her with worry in her eyes. "aunt lexa?"

"my wrist," she grits out. she watches clarke fall on the floor with a thud, holding her left wrist to her chest and crying out in pain.

raven comes out of her room to investigate after hearing the thud, "what the hell?" and just then, lexa falls on the floor next to clarke, biting her bottom lip to keep herself from screaming at the burning sensation on her right wrist. raven rushes towards them and tries to figure out what's wrong, but by the time she kneels down between them, the pain immediately subsides and clarke and lexa are left panting out the sharp, fading stings.

they sit up and examine their wrists.

their marks have changed, for the second time in their lives. a golden cogwheel with a sparkling silver crown in its centre lies over a dark blue patch with white dots resembling the sky on a starry night.

"you're soulmates," tris murmurs in awe, and lexa looks at clarke and sees the mirrored confusion on her face, then she glances at clarke's wrist.

raven makes them hold up their wrist side by side, and the four of them examine both and look for differences, for inconsistencies that may contradict tris' statement.

there are none.

.

they decide to start with coffee.

clarke tells lexa of the first time her mark changed, the night wells died. lexa tells her of when hers changed, two days after she last saw costia.

clarke tells lexa, "mine has always been a cogwheel, it's just the little details that changed. i didn't think a blue night sky would be its background though."

"the same applies for me," lexa nods, running her fingers over her new mark. she never thought it would look this beautiful, her mark, but then again, she never thought her match would be as breathtaking as clarke griffin. she adds, "i had my family's brand before, a sword. then it disappeared and i got this crown."

clarke lets out a laugh, "i guess fate always had us matched, huh?"

lexa is hesitant when she asks, "are you single, clarke?"

(she knows just because she has a mark and she has found her soulmate, it doesn't mean that this is her happy ending. clarke may be in love with someone else, clarke may not even be straight.

clarke might not want her.)

but clarke smiles and nods her head, "are you?"

"i'm married to my work, unfortunately," is lexa's reply.

and clarke leans over the table and smirks, taking lexa's hands in hers, "i guess that makes me your secret affair then."

their first date ends in front of apartment 319, with clarke's face flushed, her cheeks hurting from smiling and her lips and her wrist tingling, with lexa in the elevator with her fingers on her own lips, trying to calm the butterflies growing wild in her stomach, trying to ignore the warm sensation surrounding her mark. 

(their first date ends and their future together, begins.)

.

when lexa and clarke are both twenty-eight, lexa proposes and offers clarke the world.

clarke says yes to the proposal, tears of happiness streaming down her face, and as lexa slips on the beautiful diamond ring on her fourth finger, clarke tells her, "screw the world, i only want you."

their wrists tingle and sends goosebumps to their spine as they utter their vows on their wedding day.

their wrists tingle when lexa finds out that clarke is pregnant, after months and months of trying for a baby.

.

when lexa and clarke are both sixty-five, they waltz in their bedroom and lexa tells her wife, "clarke griffin, you fell out of the sky, didn't you?"

clarke laughs at the things her wife says these days, her beautiful mind burdened with a mild case of alzheimer's.

"i did, lexa," clarke replies, playing along with her antics.

"good," lexa nods, "you are meant for me."

**Author's Note:**

> come yell at me. or come whisper quietly into my ask box. whichever suits you.  
> etherealpumpkin.tumblr.com


End file.
